Friday, January 23, 2009


I spent most of yesterday, thinking about my father. I didn't even know I had a living father until I was 14. HIs Grandmother needed someone who could milk goats come by for about two weeks and mik her goats while she was taking care of her husband, Dad's Grandfather. She had called my grandmother to ask if she knew of any one at all who could help out.. I was not told who she was. Just that an old lady needed some help and I had the skills she needed. Sure, why not. Twice a day I was taken over to milk her goats, strain and bottle the milk. I won't tell you the condition of her equipment) in exchange, I got to spend some time with her while I waited for my grandmother or mother to come get me. She taught me how to play "this old man" on her old upright piano. It's the only thing I ever learned to play on it. Near the end of the two weeks, I was told just who she was to me. My Great Grand Mother, my father's Grandmother.. I had to ask where was my dad. I never knew if he was alive or dead.. Not only was he alive, but lived only a few blocks away. She called and asked him to come over. she had a surprise for him. He just happened to be in town. I was soo shy. It was painful for me to meet him. I didn't knw what to say, I was a mess cause I had just finished up with the goats, and so I was also stinky (a bit) and here was this stranger I was meeting. He didn't want to come over. He didn't have time, he was busy, he was going someplace else.. and she told him, You won't regret this, come over, it won't take but a minute. Please come over. And he finally agreed to come over. and I met my father. He was a large man. amost 6 foot tall, if not more. I stood about 4 foot 7 at the time (topped out at 5ft 2 inches) and he had to weigh around 300 pounds. Man,, was my Grandmother Mad when she got there to pick me up.. silence for the whole ride home. I thought I was in trouble. big trouble. silence. I wasn't in trouble Grandma Moore was. She wasn't suppose to tell me that Dad was still alive and lived so close. There was a phone call. then aother. between him and m mom.. Then he came for a visit at our house. Much better, I was cleaned up and in my own enviroment. We talked. they talked. Grandma fumed... silence. more silence. He had remarried. Judy was her name. I got to meet her as well. She was nice. We got along well. My mom and Judy got along well. Had a few laughs at my father's habits that didn't change over the years. It was good. At almost 16, I moved in to Dad's for a year. well amost a year. He got me a horse, (had a condition attached to that) At 17, I moved out again and knew why Mom and Him divorced. But, it was an intresting year. I asked him to give me "away" when I married Jerry. He said, if he was in town... I told him.. I did the right thing, I asked him first. I took his answer as a no more than a maybe and asked my older brother to give me away, instead. We saw each other a few times over the years since I got married. Last time I saw Dad, was he came out to my farm for a while. He was in the area, looking for some goats. I had just sold off the last of our goats but the neighbor behind me had pygmy goats for sale. Dad was dad. He didn't know how to be a father, really. No one really gave him a chance to. He was a bit wild and rough and I will miss him. I tried to send him a Christmas card with a letter in it each year, Some years I didn't send out any cards at all. We were not close, but we were family.

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